Kevin — October 16, 2006, 1:49 am

Who LIKES to write?

You know what I hate? When I’m sitting in a coffee shop staring at something I’m writing wondering how I’m going to get a character out of a situation somehow, in a way that isn’t stupid or lame or boring, and behind that question is the haunting thought that I’m not really a writer at all, that I’m this total fraud, and man, what am I going to do and good god fifteen minutes have passed and I still haven’t got a decent idea going here and perhaps I’ll have another cup of coffee before pulling out a pencil and stabbing myself in MY FUCKING EYE.

And next to me, at the table over, is this… bubbly… pierced… THING, with her shiny new white MacBook, telling her friend how she just LOVES to write, how it just… you know, COMES OUT, and some days she can’t even stop, she just sits and writes and writes and writes, you know? I mean, it’s just SO MUCH FUN to sit here and write in this place and the soy lattes are GREAT and OHMYGOD I JUST HAD this GREAT idea, I gotta write it RIGHT NOW K BYE!!!!

…God I hate that girl.


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  1. Comment by Sarah Walnut @ October 16, 2006, 8:18 am

    Oh my God, I know that girl (or that type of person). I hate her/them!!

    She should take her soy latte and Macbook and shove it up where the sun don’t shine.

  2. Comment by Cameron @ October 16, 2006, 9:16 pm

    The next time you see “that girl”, ask to her read her stuff. Betcha dollars to donuts it’s crap.

  3. Comment by ancientrobot @ October 16, 2006, 10:40 pm

    Here’s what you need to do. Get high. Fuck coffee. Get high and then read where you left off and then say “okay…how would this play out if a sasquatch suddenly showed up?” It might not work but it MIGHT work and if it doesn’t work then you can say “At least I tried, Kevvy baby, at least I tried.” If it does work and you find yourself writing up a storm like that girl and onto something good and you can say “Ah, Kevvy, go get yourself a snack. You deserve it.” Well, that’s my two bits. I need a snack. I deserve it.

  4. Comment by trish1118 @ October 17, 2006, 10:06 am

    I am so glad that the only creativity my writing requires is the clever placement of loopholes 😉
    Oh, and I updated my blog, Mr. “Why don’t you Update Your Blog”. Twice~

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